Wednesday, August 18, 2010

One Door Closes

As a six year old, I couldn't imagine ever wanting to move away from my parents' home. Not to go to college. Not even to get married... most especially to get married! So I told my mom exactly that.


True to her fashion, she assured me I would never have to leave if I still felt the same when I was older. She said I could always attend college while living with them, and her words and promises soothed me.



Of course, once I was a senior in high school, our conversation was almost long forgotten to me as I began excitedly envisioning life on a college campus; the thought of choosing a school so I could live with my parents never crossed my mind.


Then, over the coming months, as I found myself saying goodbye to my childhood home and the city where I'd grown up, I began to feel that old desire to never have to leave. That summer, as the days before I left for school grew fewer, I continually reminded myself, "change is good," as I tried to accept moving forward and letting go.



I've moved more than a few times since then, and each move, I've been faced with a combination of excitement for what lies ahead and sadness for what I'm leaving behind. Each place I've left has become part of me. Each new place I've come to love.


Last month, I found myself once again coming to terms with moving forward and letting go, as E and I finally sold our house in central Texas. While it was a long-anticipated event, it still came laden with conflicting emotions as I said goodbye to a home that played witness to many important moments in our lives.


We opened and closed the doors to multiple chapters in those rooms; there we began dating, became engaged, and then married. In our little brick house we celebrated both our wedding days and became a family of four by welcoming two dogs into our lives.



It was where we spent our last hours together before E's two deployments and where we reunited following many long months apart. Then, between those walls, we transitioned from a military life to a civilian one.

The night my parents left me in my freshman dorm room, I was overwhelmed by a mix of sadness, happiness, and hope for the promise of what lie ahead; I strongly felt each of those emotions again in the tear-filled moment when E and I stood in our kitchen and said our final goodbye to a place brimming with more memories than we could count.


I've made my peace with letting go of our first home, although I know there will be days when I ache to return to that place and time in our past. And I'm happy to be moving forward as it means we're growing closer to having our "boys" home again.


We've begun house-hunting here in Houston and are looking forward to settling into a new set of rooms. Rooms that will provide the backdrop for new memories during this next chapter in our lives. Rooms that will also someday, though hopefully not too soon, be hard to leave behind as I find myself again working on moving forward. And letting go.

46 comments:

Teresa Hatfield said...

Such a moving post. I believe that we all go through these times over our lifetime. Enjoy your new home.
Teresa (Splendid Sass)

Paloma {La Dolce Vita} said...

This is such a beautiful, heartfelt post, C. Sending you hugs! xo

Brooke @ Blueprint Bliss said...

What a great post. Loved it. Hope the house search is going well! xx- Brooke

Tiffany said...

Beautiful post. Loved every word & image. xo

Daniella@ThisCouldBeMeToday said...

These words are so encouraging to me. My husband just joined the Air Force and, for the first time, I'm facing moving away from my home town. Lovely, lovely post. Thank you.

shari @ little blue deer said...

Such a sweet, sweet post. My husband and I are moving soon, I feel bittersweet about it as well. XX!

studioJudith said...

A lovely touching post, indeed.
Change is good -
but not always easy.

Judith

Miss E said...

Such an amazing, heartfelt, beautiful post, my friend. Good luck on this move. You've got great perspective on everything. xoxo

Mary Jo from TrustYourStyle said...

Courtney, your post is just beautiful, and I know that your move will be a good one and as hard as it must be to move on, it's going to be exciting to hear about your new home!
Hoping you have a wonderful weekend!

xo Mary Jo

vicki archer said...

I know just how you feel...I think....savouring the memories and mounting excitement for the challenges....bittersweet but in the best way, xv.

pam@pixelimpress said...

oh, i know just how you feel, courtney. (or i think i do.) i had similar feelings when steve and i packed up in atlanta and moved cross country to seattle. i truly hated to leave our home there. while there, we fell in love, got engaged and got married. i think about that home often. i miss it. but... with our move, i started my business and we found our dog. two very very good things! good luck to you in your new house hunt! pam

La Maison Fou said...

Great post Courtney;
Sorry I am late to the post and party.
Too much work lately to keep up with my bloggin buds.
I wish you well.
L.

Meg said...

How am I just now seeing this! So beautiful Courtney! Best of luck with your house search!!! Thinking of you! :) xx

Cindy said...

Beautifully written. xo

Punctuation Mark said...

what a beautiful and heartfelt post... have a great weekend!!!

Erika ~TiptoeButterfly~ said...

i just found you - and WOW sweetie - GREAT heart touching post! - i totally feel ya with moving and "home" ... here's to u and ur honey who serve for the greater good!

*kiss kiss*
Erika
~Tiptoe Butterfly~

Courtney said...

Hi Courtney, this sounds like a nerve-wracking and exciting time in your life! I understand the complexity of the feelings one has when moving away from "home" and how it can be a challenge to make a new "place" "Home."

Your inspiring & positive outlook on life shines through in your writing and I am sure that you will find joy in the new place quickly.

All the best,

Courtney

sarah, flourish design + style said...

What a beautiful post. I wish you years full of new memories in your new home.. if you're together, they'll be there :) xx

The Bella Life said...

Wow, wow, wow!!! I can't even express to you how much I can relate to this post. In fact, I was recently pondering about the many changes I have had and all the places I have been (AND the places I am going). Arizona...Utah....Denver.... and now we may even be moving again. You are so right when you say that we as people ache for our past, but should be happy to be moving forward. Beautiful post. Really. I loved it!

-Kiersten, thebellalife

Kelley at My Island Wedding said...

well, i would like to wish you good luck with those old memories and the new ones that await you!

Cazzo said...

Beautiful post, it's a topic that touches everyone.

Julie-Inspired said...

Such a beautiful post and story...I'm so happy I found your blog today:)

Julie xo

House On Beach Street said...

Your post definitely touched my heart. My daughter, California born & raised just moved to Texas 3 months ago & it's been hard on her leaving every thing she's ever known to wander off somewhere new. It's incredibly hard on me, watching her go. I'm glad you took the time to write, it eased my pain a bit. Thank you.

wedding invitation kits said...

Life is about change and moving forward. I have many traces of tears, both happy and sad, etched in my face over the years as I have said goodbye and hello throughout my life. What a beautiful and poignant post. I'm still wiping away tears.

Charleston wedding photographers said...

Beautiful and heart felt post. Moving forward can be hard to do.

CINCHED AT THE WAIST said...

welcome to Houston!!
lovely images, lovely blog

Annina of www.cinchedatthewaist.com

Gina said...

such a beautiful and touching post.

Anna said...

I find myself in a similar situation.... and reading this post reminded me that I'm no alone! And it's ok!

The Goads said...

Wow, beautiful post! Lovely images...

Couture Carrie said...

What a lovely post!

xoxox,
CC

La Petite Gallery said...

Just found your blog, I really did enjoy it.
stop over sometime

yvonne

Ann said...

That is such a heartwarming post...both your words and images are so lovely and your story is touching, we all could feel the same way every now and then...As they say, we must embrace change to grow plus change brings so many possibilities. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

such lovely photos

Punctuation Mark said...

beautiful post and wish you a lot of luck with the new life!

Lael said...

I love your blog! The images and writing are a perfect balance! Thank you for sharing and I will definitely add your link to my blog.
Lael

Erica said...

such a beautiful, heartfelt post.

Homeowner Insurance Plan

Carlos said...

Upon reading your article. I was inspired and amazed. You have a great sense of independence. At such a young age, you already felt living on your own. That's pretty rare thing. But its a simple showing of dream and independence :)

"Best Vacuum Cleaner Reviews | hoover platinum vacuum reviews"

rooth said...

I just stumbled upon your blog and have really enjoyed this post. I also want to say - WELCOME TO HOUSTON! I'm sure that you'll grow to love it here and please stop by my blog and send me a message if you need restaurant / shopping / grocery / etc. suggestions. I know it's tough moving to a new place and can hopefully help you out!

leeqiang said...

Sheath Wedding Dress

Adi-Elena said...

i really like your writting style :X

ChinkyGirLMeL said...

what a beautiful, heartfelt post. I'm still living with my mom and I know someday soon whether I like it or not I will have to move away too and settle down and have my own family. =)

Interior Design Pro said...

There are changes in life we can not escape. Anyway as a door closes another one will open. This is a very nice post. Thanks!

Bedroom Furniture said...

Hey
Very attractive article! A theme like yours with a few simple adjustments would really make my blog stand out.

discount furniture said...

Hi there
Beautiful choice! Awesome article and straight to the point. I definitely believe what you stated!

buy furniture said...

Hello
Wonderful! Can I merely say what a relief to uncover someone who essentially knows what they’re speaking about on the internet?

Savannah Lianne Jarina said...

Nicely presented information in this post, I prefer to read this kind of
stuff. The quality of content is fine and the conclusion is excellent.

purchase worldwide facebook fans
buy facebook likes/fans